4am, we walk out of the club.
Frustrated you are and impatient I am.
Kindness can’t be found here.
You say leave a club at 4am and they’ll think you desperate.
The men you mean.
Frustrated you are. Angry I am.
We get home, raised voices and misunderstandings are exchanged.
You say, you don’t want us repeating your mistakes.
A time ago, he asks why you don’t wear those extra long extensions you used to.
Why you keep your hair shaved.
He asks where the tight dresses are.
That red lipstick that sometimes coloured your lips.
Come perform your feminity he silently says.
Find the pretty and quiet again.
Put away the scarfs and smooth down those tomboy ways.
Who was lying when we met?
Did I sell you a dream of a woman I was not or did you seem more accepting of the me I didn’t show you.
What is a woman?
In your mid-twenties, induction week at the firm, a presentation will be given.
The usual will be said.
Polite and conversational wins the client.
Personal image comes on screen.
For her, two slides are used.
Length of skirts stipulated, colour of tops described and an emphasis on make-up quantity.
For him, blue shirts recommended.
Quiet shuffles in our seats.
To be women is to be restrained for their indiscipline.
after the wilderness 